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What a Year It’s Been – A Look Back at the Courage You’ve Built

As we roll towards the end of the year — that magical stretch where everything slows down, twinkles a bit more, and invites us to breathe — I’ve been looking back at everything we’ve walked through together. And honestly? I’m giving all of us a round of applause. This year has asked a lot of you… and you’ve shown up with grit, grace and the kind of courage that sneaks up on you and says, “Hey, you’re stronger than you realised.”

Let’s rewind through the biggest themes we explored this year.

We started the year with the story that drives every success

Whether you think you can or you think you can’t – you’re right.
It’s simple, but it’s the backbone of everything.
The story you tell yourself shapes your nervous system, your confidence and your willingness to try. And this year, many of you shifted that story. You swapped hopelessness for curiosity, frustration for patience, fear for courage. Your inner voice became an ally rather than an enemy, and that changes everything.

Then came the power of visualisation

You discovered that seeing yourself succeed, before you even turned the ignition, primes your brain for calm and confidence. Looking at photos of your “trigger roads”, imagining yourself driving them smoothly, rehearsing the victory… all of it made those previously intimidating routes feel less alien and more doable. The brain loves familiarity.  You used that to your advantage.

After that, we explored the magic of NLP

Neuro-Linguistic Programming showed you that the language you use shapes the body’s response. A tiny shift from “I can’t handle that” to “I can’t manage that – YET” plants seeds into the subconscious brain that this will be possible.  Words became tools. Tools became progress.

And we couldn’t forget the underestimated power of smiling

Many of you practised this one with brilliant humour. That gentle lift of the cheeks acts as a signal of safety to the brain. Even a small smile can loosen fear’s grip, calm your breathing and give you a little extra bravery before a drive. A surprisingly easy way to nudge your nervous system towards ‘I can’.

Succession progression started showing its magic too

By gently pushing yourself onto slightly harder roads, step by step you proved to your brain that discomfort isn’t danger. Roads that once elicited panic started feeling normal. Roads that felt impossible became manageable. Your world widened, not because fear vanished, but because you kept going.

And then came the big realisation: doing hard things grows you

Distress tolerance became a theme. Learning to stay with the butterflies, the racing thoughts, the sweaty palms, instead of running from them. You discovered that courage isn’t the absence of discomfort but the willingness to feel it and move anyway. That skill changed your driving… and your life.

Goal-setting and journalling played a huge part too

We learnt to set goals that were realistic, kind and meaningful, not January-gym-membership goals that last five minutes. Writing your wins, your wobbles and your progress helps you see just how far you’ve come. Your journal becomes evidence. A tangible record. A quiet cheerleader. (Don’t forget I have created a unique and specific driving journal to assist you in setting your goals and reflecting back on them and create your own tangible record of how far you’ve come).

Somewhere along the way, I pushed my own comfort zone

Not only have I gradually reduced my anxiety of riding far and wide on my motorcycle by riding more and fearing less!  But my invite to appear on BBC Woman’s Hour was a moment I’ll never forget. Partly because it was an absolute privilege, and partly because it scared the life out of me. It reminded me that I’m not immune to fear either. Growth doesn’t stop. Comfort zones don’t magically stretch themselves. And the only way forward is through. Do more, fear less.

At the end of the year, we talked about the body’s reset button

Vagus nerve exercises became your secret calming ritual. Slow exhales, humming, gentle stretches, finishing your shower with cold water, weird eye movements. These simple tools help you regulate your nervous system and reclaim calm in moments that previously felt overwhelming. A small action that creates a huge shift in the long run.

And now… here we are, just a short time away from a brand-new year.

Not starting from square one, not hoping for a miracle, but building on solid ground with the resilience, courage and confidence you’ve created.

(For those of you who are new to this newsletter, welcome! For you, and anyone who would like a reminder, you can look back at these subjects on my blog page so you can keep up to date).

Next month we step into a new year and a new chapter.
Fresh goals.
More tiny wins.

Plenty of moments where you surprise yourself
More “I didn’t think I could do that — but I did”.

For those of you at the beginning, take it one step at a time. For those who have been here a while, you’re continuing your climb.  Remember, progress, not perfection.

And I’m right here with you, cheering you on every mile of the way.

Wishing you all a very peaceful Christmas and happy and very successful 2026.

If you’d told me a few years ago that my work on driving anxiety would take me to the studios of Woman’s Hour on BBC Radio 4, I’d have laughed nervously and said “not a chance”. Yet there I was on Monday, heart thumping (in a good way), waiting to go live on one of the UK’s most iconic radio shows.

The topic? Driving anxiety – something I’ve dedicated my career to helping people overcome. I spoke about why it happens, why it’s so rarely discussed, and how small, consistent steps can help people regain their confidence behind the wheel.

Walking into Broadcasting House felt surreal. Security checks and badges, waiting areas and a Green Room, (I’ve always wanted to know what it’s like in one of these). Clutching my Driving Journal that I had made copious notes in.  I was second on the day’s list, and honestly quite grateful I wasn’t left hanging around. I was brought through to the live studio where the presenter (Kylie Pentelow) was still engaged on the first segment interview with someone on Zoom.  I was guided to sit in front of a BBC live microphone.  At this point I had an overwhelming urge to clear my throat, but couldn’t as it would be picked up on the mic and there for however many thousands of people tuned. It was all a far cry from my usual environment of car parks and dual carriageways. But in some ways it felt familiar too: a nervous person (me!) about to do something scary for a positive reason.

The subject matter changed to the reason I was invited and initially and the floor was given to another journalist (Mary McCarthy), who was on Zoom from Belgium explaining her issue with motorway driving.  Then the presenter brought me in to respond and once I got going I started to feel more calm, like it was having a conversation with one of my clients.  We talked about how driving anxiety often begins and about the closed loop of thoughts, feelings and actions that feeds itself until it feels unbreakable.

What struck me most was how many listeners were clearly hungry for this conversation. The texts and emails that came in while I was on air showed me how common driving anxiety really is, and how relieved people feel to know they’re not alone.

What I’ve learned from coaching hundreds of people, and why compassion – not shame – is the key to getting back on the road.

It reminded me of the first time a client told me “I thought I was the only one who felt like this” – that’s exactly why I do what I do.

If you’re one of the many people who feel anxious about driving, please know this:

• You’re not weak or silly – your nervous system is simply trying to keep you safe.
• Confidence is built, not born – and you can rebuild it at any stage of life.
• Small, steady steps work – and you don’t have to do it alone.

I’d prepared so much more to say, but as is the way with live radio, it all went by in a flash! Before I knew it the segment was over.

I came away from the BBC feeling humbled and energised. This conversation is finally reaching a wider audience, and I’m so grateful to everyone who’s supported my work – from clients to colleagues to the Woman’s Hour team.

If you missed the programme, you can listen back here. And if you’d like more tips and encouragement on overcoming driving anxiety, keep an eye on my posts or get in touch – I’m always happy to chat.

Here’s to more open conversations about driving anxiety – and to the courage it takes, whether you’re getting back behind the wheel or stepping into a radio studio for the first time!

I left the studio feeling a mix of relief, gratitude and a huge sense of responsibility to keep this conversation going. So, in the spirit of sharing what I couldn’t squeeze into those few minutes on air, here are some take-aways for anyone struggling with driving anxiety:

What I Wish I’d Had Time to Say on Air

1️⃣ Name the loop.
Notice your thoughts (“I can’t drive there”), your feelings (tight chest, sweaty palms) and your actions (avoiding routes). Awareness is the first step.

2️⃣ Change the story you tell yourself.
The narrative you repeat becomes the reality you live. If you constantly tell yourself “I’ll always be anxious”, your nervous system will believe you. Shift to “I’m not confident… yet” — that single word keeps the door open to change and positive outcomes.

3️⃣ Take tiny steps.
Short, calm drives at quiet times build confidence faster than big scary leaps. Every small success gives your brain evidence for a new story: “I can do this.”

4️⃣ Be your own kind coach.
Self-compassion isn’t indulgence – it regulates your nervous system and fuels progress. The kinder you are, the safer your body feels, the faster you learn.

5️⃣ Get support.
You don’t have to do this alone. A trusted friend, a coach, or a community can keep you moving forward and help you reframe your story when you get stuck.

Two Extra Tips I Love

6️⃣ Build your stress tolerance.
Confidence isn’t about never feeling uncomfortable – it’s about learning to cope with it. One simple way to practise this outside the car is to end your shower with 30 seconds of cold water. It gently trains your nervous system to tolerate discomfort, which can make those first few drives feel less overwhelming.

7️⃣ Use P plates (or your local equivalent).
In the UK, new drivers can display a green “P” plate instead of the red “L” used by learners. It signals to other road users that you may need a little extra space and patience. If you’re outside the UK, check what’s available in your country – a simple sign can help ease the pressure while you rebuild your confidence.

Keep Journaling

During the interview, I spoke about how I encourage people to set goals and track their progress in a journal. If you’d like to dive deeper, I’ve linked to my original blog on why this matters.

My Driving Journal is designed to help you do exactly that — and it’s available in both hard copy (for UK residents) and downloadable formats, so you can choose what works best for you.

Welcome to British Summer Time. Pity the weather didn’t get the memo on Sunday.

 

The view from my home village windmill is amazing on a good day, spanning over Buckinghamshire and I’ve been lucky enough to see it on better days.

 

The reason I was there today was to speak with the volunteers who run the mill about having some of my forthcoming wedding photos taken from the windmill’s balcony. 

 

My problem is I don’t do heights. I’ve posted about this before as a few years ago I did manage to Ab-sail 100 meters down the Spinnaker Tower in Portsmouth and while I felt amazing after I had completed it. However, I haven’t done it again since, and hence if I attempted it again I would probably feel as petrified as if it were my first time. 

 

So to be able to stand on this balcony in the summer looking radiant, happy and confident I need to be exposed regularly to being here. 

 

Micro-stressing my brain with Exposure Therapy is the only way I’m going to overcome the dizziness and wobbly legs I feel when I stand here.  Just doing this once and not doing it again for a few weeks will not reduce the fear. 

 

I don’t feel comfortable doing this either, neither do I expect the discomfort to go away entirely. But I do expect to be able to cope with it and not over think the whole situation. 

 

I’ll post updates from time to time to show you my progress. 

(By doing this I’m also making myself accountable to you). 

 

Whether it’s heights or driving over a bridge, driving down hill, a motorway or whatever it is that triggers discomfort, the ONLY way you are ever going to overcome this is to do it.  Feel the fear and do it anyway and by micro-stressing your brain you will slowly desensitise. As time goes by you will slowly feel less uncomfortable. 

 

Also making a commitment to others makes you more accountable and do you’re more likely to continue, and so you’re more likely to continue. 

 

We can do this together! 

Baby steps!